There are some tasks in life that are easy, like ordering chicken over fish on a menu or choosing a gift from a registry. It’s all fine and good when all you have to do is point. When it comes to wedding season however, it isn’t always so simple. Woman know this and therefore prepare well in advance for the occasion. There are themes and rules and sometimes stipulations on colour. Daunting I know, but completely achievable, I promise.
Lucky for you, all eyes will be on the bride and groom. Just don’t think you can slack off because nobody wants to be the weird guy in the mustard coloured suit at a black tie wedding.
Firstly, you may want to read the invitation. If you are unsure about the dress-code the invitation will be your first clue. Assuming it doesn’t tell you what to wear, look at the invite. Is it engraved and fancy, held at a swanky hotel or on a wine farm? Understandably the dress-code differs from location to location as well as the time of day.
Day Wedding: Semi-Formal/Formal
A day wedding can be divided into two obvious dress-codes; semi formal and formal. Let’s look at the latter first. A dark suit is most appropriate and works well with a beautiful pastel coloured shirt. Wearing a tie to a formal day wedding is imperative (alternatively yes, a bow-tie is fine too) but it’s colour/style depends on the shirt and your own preference and by softening the look, or rather adapting the suit to a day wedding through colour.
As for semi-formal, the rules are somewhat relaxed but I advise you to stay on a similar path to that of a formal dress-code. Linen suiting, light coloured suits, open collared shirts with dress pants and blazers and even more colourful shirts are all appropriate. Adding a pocket square may be the perfect replacement to a tie while keeping your look appropriate and trendy.
Your best bet would be to wear a dark suit to an evening wedding. If it’s a warm weather wedding try avoid a heavy woolen suit. You may even want to warm up the colours you wear to an evening wedding. The fancier the invite the chances are leaning towards a tuxedo, just never before 5 p.m! If need be make a quick call to the bride or groom to make sure.
Beach Wedding
Your sartorial tastes are more than likely going to thrive at a beach wedding over any other. The rules are relaxed and the options to look good are just about endless. A linen suit is most favored by the male beach wedding guest and for obvious reasons. Breathability. As for colour, you should avoid white because of simple wedding etiquette. This may however be the theme in which case, white it is.
Wearing a light blazer and shirt and paired with loafers is a good standard look. The tie is generally up to you but open collar works nicely with an added detail, a pocket square or tasteful flower buttonhole for example. To keep looking fashionable and suave you may even want to go for a preppy look or include the smallest nautical influence for flair. Getting cute is a bad move; I once attended a beach wedding and a guest wore a bow-tie, t-shirt and board shorts. He was soon after escorted out.
Black Tie/Optional Wedding
South African weddings are not commonly a part of this theme. In Cape Town even less so, I assure you. But you may be invited to a very formal wedding where going ‘Black tie’ is required. This will include a dinner jacket, dress shirt, cummerbund, highly polished or patent leather shoes (in black) and of course a bow-tie that matches the lapel facings. Thankfully, designers and suit-makers have caught onto the need for such occasions and slim fit/updated versions of that old penguin suit are available in higher-end stores.
Themed Wedding
Brace yourself, it happens. If you have been invited to a masquerade themed wedding or something equally ridiculous consider how you can apply the theme to your own attire. If it’s a strict costume ball then just go with it and have a good time. Just remember, there is almost always a bar!
RULES FOR THE WEDDING GUEST
- Absolutely no denim should be worn to a wedding. Of course, if you’re foolish enough to wear jeans to a Summer wedding then you will have both the sun and the bride to deal with. This rule includes cargo pants, sneakers (I shudder to imagine) and anything distressed or with holes.
- No white suits after 5p.m and no Tuxedo’s before 5p.m.
- A wedding is a joyous occasion and should be enjoyed by all. Taking special care to respect the bride and groom on their big day is very important. If you are at all uncertain about what is appropriate, make that phone-call.